Thursday is Lodge Day for me this week. Noon till close. Come see me, I’ll be the big hairy one knocking shit over behind the bar.
A joke for today:
An avid golfer was involved in a terrible car crash and was rushed to the hospital. Just before he was put under, the surgeon popped in to see him.
“I have some good news and some bad news,” says the surgeon. “The bad news is that I have to remove your right arm!”
“Oh God no!” cries the man. “My golfing is over! Please Doc, what’s the good news?”
“The good news is… … I have another one to replace it with, but it’s a woman’s arm and so I’ll need your permission before I can go ahead with the transplant.”
“Go for it doc,” says the man, “as long as I can play golf again.”
The operation went well and a year later the man was out on the golf course when he bumped into the surgeon.
“Hi, how’s the new arm?” asks the surgeon.
“Just great,” says the golfer. “I’m playing the best golf of my life. My new arm has a much finer touch, and my putting has really improved.”
“That’s wonderful,” said the surgeon.
“Not only that,” continued the golfer, “my handwriting has improved, I’ve learned how to sew my own clothes and I’ve even taken up painting landscapes in watercolors.”
“That’s unbelievable!” said the surgeon, “I’m so glad to hear the transplant was such a success. Are you having any side effects?”
“Well, just two”, said the golfer, “I have trouble parallel parking, and every time I get an erection I get a headache.”