Another Day, Another Post

Some of you may wonder why I take too long to post or skip a day or two between posts. Well sometimes I just do not know what the hell to say. People that know me personally probably find that hard to believe because I never shut up. Or at least that is what Becker tells me. But what the hell does she know.  LOL. At any rate things are boring up here right now. Tom Miller is back in Missouri so it is no fun making fun at him. Da Fish ain’t here to I have no one to get me all jacked up. Princess is back in Iowa with all my Iowa friends. The Mantieno  Boys are hard at work saving money for their UP trip this winter.  Mr M, I see Steph more than I see you any more, but that is not all that bad. I’m all alone up here right now. Just me and Lenny Blades burning the midnight oil at Da Lodge solving all the worlds problems. God I love the UP, wish you were all here all the time.

I read that 4,153,237 people got married last year. Not to cause any trouble, but shouldn’t that be an even number?

I find it ironic that the colors red, white, and blue stand for freedom until they are flashing behind you.

When wearing a bikini, women reveal 90% of their body. Men are so polite they only look at the covered parts.

Relationships are a lot like algebra. Have you ever looked at your X and wondered Y?

America is a country which produces citizens who will cross the ocean to fight for democracy but won’t cross the street to vote.

You know that tingly little feeling you get when you love someone? That’s common sense leaving your body.

My therapist says I have a preoccupation with vengeance. We’ll see about that.

I think my neighbor is stalking me as she’s been Googling my name on her computer. I saw it through my telescope last night.

Money talks … but all mine ever says is good-bye.

You’re not fat, you’re just easier to see.

If you think nobody cares whether you’re alive, try missing a couple of payments.

I always wondered what the job application is like at Hooters. Do they just give you a bra and say, “Here, fill this out?”

I can’t understand why women are OK that JC Penny has an older women’s clothing line named, “Sag Harbor.”

Denny’s has a slogan, “If it’s your birthday, the meal is on us.” If you’re in Denny’s and it’s your birthday, your life sucks!

The location of your mailbox shows you how far away from your house you can go in a robe before you start looking like a mental patient.

I think it’s pretty cool how Chinese people made a language entirely out of tattoos.

Money can’t buy happiness, but it keeps the kids in touch!

The reason Mayberry was so peaceful and quiet was because nobody was married. Andy, Aunt Bea, Barney, Floyd, Howard, Goober, Gomer, Sam, Earnest T Bass, Helen, Thelma Lou, Clara and, of course, Opie were all single. The only married person was Otis, and he stayed drunk.