A Briton, a Scot, and an Irish lad are drinking together one night.

After a while, the English bloke says: “I was cleaning my daughter’s room the other day and found a packet of fags. I was really shocked, as I hadn’t the faintest she’d been smoking.”

“Ach,” the Scotsman says. “That’s nothing. I was cleaning me own daughter’s room the other day when I can across a half-empty bottle o’ whiskey. I was really shocked as I had no idea she was drinking, and at her age!”

With that, the Irishman says “Both you lads haven’t a thing to worry about, next to me. Why, I was cleaning my daughter’s room the other day when I found a packet of condoms. And ye want to talk about being shocked! How was I to know she had a cock?”